He drops it to the ground and crushes it under his heel. He opens up his phone with a paper clip (just like an iPhone, it's got one of those all-metal bodies that don't let you remove the back) and he pulls out the SIM from slot 2. He gives Poh's limp body a little nudge with the toe of his crocodile-skin cowboy boot (I said he was sleazy, right?) just to make sure she's dead. Mostly, though, he just likes the freedom it gives him to be a dirty sleazebag.īut for now, Jay has other matters to attend to. If Telstra ever has another outage followed by a day of free data, he'll choose his Telstra SIM for data and be all over that freebie like white on rice. He likes the way he can choose whether to make his calls from SIM1 or SIM2 when he's dialling, and how he gets to choose which SIM is used for data. No, Jay bought this Oppo R9 for its two SIMs. Moreover, the camera performs fairly poorly in low light, the very time when Jay (being a thief as well as having a wife on SIM #1 and a a lover on SIM #2) likes to skulk around.Īnd certainly he wouldn't have got the Oppo R9 for its performance, which lags a little at times in real-world usage (it's prone to dropping frames during Netflix playback, for instance), and which doesn't do very well in benchmark tests, particularly when it comes to games and graphics. I mean, why else would a big spender like Jay have a $599 phone that's trying to look like a $1230 phone and is, in all honesty, making a pretty decent fist of it?Ĭertainly he wouldn't be buying the Oppo R9 for the camera, which would have been on par with much more expensive phones a year or two ago, but which now looks a little grainy by comparison to the best cameras on the market. He must be in this latter, duplicitous category. The audience will gasp as they come to realise it really, really isn't an iPhone after all, but in fact it's a dual-SIM phone, perfect for cheapskates who like to have a second SIM to make discounted overseas calls, and perfect for duplicitous bastards who lead two separate lives.Ĭlearly Jay, having just murdered Poh with a very ostentatious handgun, is not a cheapskate. He can never remember which button to press, so he turns his phone back over and looks at a Post-it note stuck to the bottom. "Hey honey, I bought the milk and I'm on my way home" and goes to press "send".Ĭuriously, there's not just one send button at the bottom of the SMS app, but two: one labelled "SIM1 Send" and one labelled "SIM2 Send". We pause the film to give the audience the chance to wonder, why didn't Oppo just use stock Android on the R9, the way it does on some of its other phones? Good question, audience! The Oppo R9 has a fingerprint scanner, which can unlock the phone but which some apps don't recognise. Much of the Android overlay software, which Oppo calls ColorOS, is designed to look like an iPhone, too. Job done, he turns his Oppo R9 phone back over and starts to write a text message, tapping on an SMS app logo that looks uncannily like the Apple iMessage logo even though the R9 is an Android phone running the slightly outdated but nevertheless not too bad Android 5.1.Ĭlearly, the cloning with this phone didn't stop at the external looks. Constant product placement, too.Īs Poh fumbles with the humungous chef's knife in her handbag (she is, after all, a celebrity chef), Jay pulls out a gold-plated, diamond-encrusted pistol and shoots her in the food-loving stomach.
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